Wednesday, September 26, 2012


I've been informed that I am taking on some guys from another department. My crew is growing, but I have mixed feelings about it. I just want to find a new job. Now it seems they are trying to make things a little better for me financially come next year. This is a dilemma.

Friday, August 10, 2012

Friends for years

Back in February I went to a wine Meetup event, where I ran into my friend LaLa. Her name is actually Laura, but this is not the Laura that I dated years ago who had caused me other dating issues. LaLa is a beautiful woman, who I have always liked.  We met 3 or so years ago. I had thought about asking her out in the past, but our differing political and religious views made me decide not to. I avoid confrontation before there is a confrontation.

Well this night she was looking particularly gorgeous. She made room for me next to her at one of the large tables reserved for our group. We shared a couple bottles of wine, and some appetizers. Eventually we went to a club with a few of the fun people in the group, and danced until very late. We had a really great time. I knew after that night that my feelings for her were not going to be easy to contain.

There is a whole lot of background I am leaving out here.

My other friend Laura (we call her Lolly) and I were invited to LaLa's birthday party a couple weeks later. It happened to be at a bar that had scheduled one of LaLa's favorite bands to play. The turnout for the party was quite big as LaLa has a lot of friends. Everyone was buying LaLa shots. Normally I would have as well, but it seemed like she was getting drunk awfully early. She usually can hold her liquor pretty well, but it wasn't long before she was completely shit faced.

LaLa has always been nice to me, but this night she was hanging on me a lot, just trying to stay standing for the most part. But then it happened. While I was standing next to her, holding her up, she spoke directly into my ear. "I haven't made out with anyone in over 2 years". I looked at her and just smiled. I gave her a big hug, but I was not about to take advantage of her in this state she was in. I wasn't sure what to do with that nugget, but it did tell me she was at least interested. I made some ham-handed comment, but stayed clear of making any move. later, a couple of friends that lived near her took her home.

I told Lolly what had been said on our way home. She thought it was just LaLa being really drunk, and didn't think that LaLa was interested in me in that way. I didn't really agree, but it did introduce some doubt in my head.

The next day there was a parade that a bunch of friends including LaLa were going to. I waited until 10:30 to call LaLa to see if she was feeling ok, and if she wanted a ride to the parade. She didn't sound well. She had left her vehicle at the bar the night before, but she said she couldn't even get out of bed at this point.

I felt bad for her, and told her I would bring her some Gatorade and crackers to see if that would help. I figured she wouldn't even remember what she said to me, but I could at least get a better idea of her feelings... maybe.

When I got to her house, her son was just leaving, so he let me in. I found LaLa in the guest room, still wearing the dress she had on from the previous night. As bad as she felt, she still looked damn good.

I sat on the edge of the bed hydrating her, and talking. She either didn't remember saying what she said, or was intentionally avoiding it. She didn't act too friendly, but that may have just been because of the hangover. I was going to deal with it some other time.

A couple weeks later Lolly was asking a number of us if we'd like to go on a cruise. Her mom and uncle were planning on one, and asked her to invite some friends if she'd like. I wasn't too thrilled about the idea. She told me that a bunch of her girlfriends were going (Michaela, Ella, Linda, and LaLa... yes LaLa). I had just been on a cruise in September, and I didn't want to share another cabin with one of my guy friends, especially because most of the guys in this group of friends, are not the kind of friends I would like sharing a room with. The thought just seemed to depress me. I told Lolly that I probably wouldn't be going.

A week or so later Lolly told me that Linda had backed out, leaving LaLa without a roommate. I said to Lolly, "I wonder if LaLa would mind me as a roommate". She told me it wouldn't hurt to ask. So I texted LaLa right away, and got an immediate YES in response. This made me smile.

A week later I got a call from my friend Al. He works for a Department of Defense contractor, and had an extra ticket to the National Space Symposium and wanted me to come. This sounded very cool, so I jumped at the chance. I asked Al who else was going. He told me LaLa and Suzanne. YES!

LaLa was in a dress that was absolutely killing me. It's one of those dresses that makes a woman's boobs really stand out. I tried not too stare. We were all having a blast. They had a Monte Carlo night going, so she and I were sitting at a table having the best time.

At the end of the night I walked her to her car. We stood there and talked for a minute, and I just decided I needed to kiss her. It wasn't a big kiss, but it was there to test the waters. The water was fine ;) I left it at that for the night. I knew I'd be seeing her the next evening for the second day of the symposium.

The next night of the symposium went even better.

We've broken many of each of our own dating rules. We're now at about the 4 month mark, which is way past the point where I usually see the very big red flags. This one is a keeper (knock on wood).

I by no means think that things are easy. Those differences I talked about earlier do come up, but we've promised each other that in those areas we agree to disagree, and to not fight about it. So far that is working perfectly.

18 months later...

I wonder if anyone really reads this stuff anymore...

This has been a crazy year. Let's cover what had happened with what I talked about in my last post first.

The thing with Michaela never happened. I considered it for a short time then saw some problems that were red flags to me.

My brother's health is bad. He did lose his job and was out of work other than some occasional PC repair work. His roommate moved out, which made paying the mortgage even more difficult since his regular job was gone. On top of all that, he was under water on his mortgage. I brought up the fact that he will probably lose the house. It was a hard pill for him to swallow.

I was dating a lady, Susan, who is a realtor. She helped out immensely, and even got Mike some moving cash through a government program. When it was all done Mike moved in with me.
We've totally rearranged the basement, and it is now very livable. Mike's health is still a struggle, but at least he doesn't have that house hanging over his head.

The thing with Susan was fairly short lived. I broke it off in early December due to too much jealousy and insecurity on her part. She is a great lady, but has to get past some of her issues.

I took what I thought was going to be a long break from dating.